just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
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