its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Randomize
