I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
Its about making memories worth repressing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize