I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
I licked your asshole in confidence.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
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