sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
Randomize