Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Randomize