This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
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