birth control should be required to get into college
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Randomize
