my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
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Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
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She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.