we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
P.S. I can't hear my feet
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Randomize
