Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
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