what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Randomize
