it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
Randomize
