You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Randomize
