We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
Randomize
