i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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