Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Randomize
