There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
I have surprise drugs for everyone
It's official drugs can't kill me
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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