at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I enjoy the company of your penis
Randomize