so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
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