i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Randomize