Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Randomize
