I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
Randomize