I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
There was a lot of him and a little penis
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
