I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
Randomize
