He asked to "fluff my boner.."
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
Randomize
