i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
Randomize
