I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
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