lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
Randomize