If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
Randomize
