She's JV to your varsity
The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize
