i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
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