It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
just tell him i said nine months
The idiot babysitter thought my dildo was a teething toy and gave it to our child.
Did you put it in the freezer again?
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If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
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