You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
she peed on how many people?
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He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
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