He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize