Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
