dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Randomize
