My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize