the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
Randomize
