Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Randomize
