I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize
