Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
