Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
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