Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
