I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
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