Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
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