If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
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