At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Randomize
