Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
Need sex. Gaining weight.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
Randomize
