Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Randomize
