Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
Randomize
