Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
