i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
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